2 Astounding Advices Dad Entrusted To Me Which I Recalled At 0130 Hrs
Trust me on this.
Losing a beloved person through death does not mean that we lose them altogether.
It all depends on which of the memories we choose to keep and those we choose to erase.
This week being away from work by my choice gives me a chance to try recalling my dad’s advice.
Just like any grandpapa’s advice being a gem to some of us, this comes from my dad.
Let’s read.
Don’t keep whining about your job lest you grow tired of it faster than you should.
In my 20s, I served my country as a prison warden. My dad fetched me to work on his bike whenever I reported for the night duty.
Once, I told my dad that I didn’t feel like going to work. I didn’t like the old mindset of the officers who were very toxic.
“…Sssshhh! Don’t speak that way, Lissa. Don’t keep saying you didn’t want to go to work. This is the bread-and-butter God has given to you. You should go to work with all that great energy of thanksgiving, happy God gives you this…” he caressed my hair, a gentle way of a dad’s love.
At my 40s now void of feelings about what I should do next, I remember my dad’s word.
“…Ssshhh! Be careful with what you say, Lissa. Your words are powerful. They are prayers. So don’t keep whining about the job lest you lose it way faster than you expect my dear…”
Lesson:
No workplace is ever a home-sweet-home ground. The job isn’t the problem most of the time. The colleagues are.
So, my dad is telling me to focus and do my job while figuring out another plan. The day will always come when i know i want to leave for another opportunity.
What my dad try telling me is that our frustrations or resentment that keep repeating in us will only makes us unmotivated to go to work. And that will only lead us to our resignation.
We do not need to be fired or terminated. It is enough that complaining and listening to colleagues who complains will drain our spirit. So be careful with what we listen to, and who we socialize with at work.
Don’t say they are your friends when they are your colleagues at work.
My dad’s life gave a lot of lessons to me.
To be peaceful, I always tagged along with him to the coffeeshop. It was boring to stare at the sky blankly with him. But, it was still the best thing ever because he wanted me to learn to make time during the day to be quiet.
Here what my dad tells me. One day I saw a familiar man who always joked with dad.
“Hey dad! That’s your friend!”
After departing from their spontaneous social meet-up, dad walked home with me. He said…
“…One day when you start working, don’t introduce your colleagues as your friends. When you introduce anyone from your workplace, say they are your colleagues. Not everyone at work is a friend. And to find a colleague who is a friend is really rare…”
I think about it too.
Dad always remind me if anyone of the colleagues is a friend, he/she will keep in touch even after we are no longer working together.
They will make time to catch up for coffee and tea.
And dad also reminds me a valuable advise. “The first time you report to a new job, observe who are the ones who will socialise with you. Observe the dynamics of people especially during break time. Who they sit with can tell you a lot about the workplace dynamics. And if a workplace has a lot more of a particular race, that’s not healthy. Always pray for a good mix of colleagues”.
And I will say that my dad tells the truth.
Lesson:
Never see your colleagues as friends. Not all of them are friends. You’ll only know when you leave the place.
Even though my dad said those who are friends will keep in touch with me even after I resign, that it is not truly the case.
I have people who keep in touch with me asking and wanting to see my updates. They want to be abreast of my progression in life. They want to know so that there is something to talk about when they return to work. They want to know what role and rank I take.
A friend will not see your role, rank or age or your race and beliefs.
They defend you in your absence.
There are many more Advices my dad gave me as I grow up.
The only difference right no is his physical absence. Thus, hearing him speak is by different means. — Memories.
You see…When your love ones are still around, you can hear their voices and see them. Once they leave for another side, you can only speak to them, but you can’t hear from them like you used to.
Appreciate the memories.
Let these guide you as you move on.
Because I will.
